Jokes unlimited

Jokes unlimited


Bush: Osama mile toh use fod do..

Gandhi: Hinsa achi baat nhi, use chhod do..

Einstein: Samay rukta nhi, to use mod do..

Manmohan: theek hai!

Sonia: desh k liye mujhe vote do..

Arnold Schwarzenegger: Biceps build karne ke liye uspar load do..

Bill Gates: Windows unlock karne k liye use code do!

Rajnikanth: oye admin ! mere kaarname duniya ke samne lana chhod do

And the best one

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ACP Praduman: Daya, khooni andar hai, main kehta hu darwaza tod do..

सासूबाई (नव्या सुनेला):- हे बघ, या घरात मी गृहमंत्री आहे. अर्थमंत्रालयही मीच सांभाळते.

तुझे सासरे परराष्ट्रमंत्री तर तुझा नवरा अन्न व वस्त्रपुरवठामंत्री आहे. तुझी नणंद नियोजन व देखरेख मंत्रालय सांभाळते.

तुला कोणतं खातं हवं?

सूनबाई:- मी आपली विरोधी पक्षातच बसते.


Now mothers will reprimand their kids in the following way.
Modi ban na hai na?
Phir Rahul wali harkat kyu ki?
Ab Manmohan ban ke kyu khada hai?
Bol ya toh Kejriwal ki tarah thappad khayega ?



Finally, the bizarre is over and here goes the awards for different category.
Best Actor: Arvind Kejriwal.
Best Debut child actor: Rahul Gandhi.
Best female actor in supporting role- Mamta Banerjee.
Best female actor in negative role- Sonia Gandhi.
Best actor in Romantic role- Digvijay Singh.
Life time achievement award-Lal Krishna Advani.
Movie of the year-Abki baar Modi Sarkar.
Its heard that Anurag Basu has approached Manmohan Singh for "Barfi 2" 

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India and Indians will Rock

With Modi Govt.round the corner every non Gujarati should know the basic pronunciation of the Gujarati frequently used words  one should know the words given below: 

What we Gujarati say ...

What we mean to say:

Hole.....................Hall 

Snakes.............Snacks 

Pogram.........Program 

Egg-joss.........Exhaust 

Egg-jess......... Adjust

Fota...............Photos 

Liptik............Lipstick 

Phast...........Fast 

Phulowur....Flower 

Gilas............Glass 🍹

Palty............Party 🎊

Gorment...Government 

Peeja..........Pizza 🍕

temparvari.......Temporary 

Punch.........Sponge 🚿

Die-Vos.........Divorce 

Impotent.....Important 📌

New Brand...Brand new 💖

Repsesion...........Reception  

Bowel...........Bowl 

JeeTV............ZeeTV 

Coal.............Call 📞

Col age.........College 🏤

Estawbury...Strawberry 

Isscul..........School 📚

Soaping... Shopping 💵

Vija................Visa 💳

Pecial ....... Special 

Mengo ......... Mango

tesan.........Station

mujiam.......Museum 

Fes wass......... Face wash

Shempu...........shampoo

Anyone dont take it personally but now gujus as well as indians will be having great powers to show the world what we are.

Old slogan :

Dudh mangoge to khir denge aur Kashmir

maangoge to chir denge.

New slogan :

Na dudh denge na khir denge agar kashmir

manga to sala Lahore bhi chin lenge.

Kyuki is baar

No Silent Sardar,

Ab ki baar Modi sarkaar!

SOMEONE SAVE RAHUL

Rahul gandhi to sonia :-  score itna jaldi badh raha he Maxwell bjp me he kya 😂😂..

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Modi: Aare Rahul result aaye hai.
Rahul: Kya hai?
Modi: tujhe 21 states me KT lagi hai.

?.....................

10th std me aaye toh examination system
change,
11th ka admission process change,

11-12th me aaye toh uska bhi system
change
Graduation mai aaya to udhar bhi system change,

aur ab pehli bar vote kiya toh sarkar bhi
change !!
True fr 1993 batch 

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Breaking News Media confirm tht thy seen Rahul Gandhi Asking Doremon For his Gadget To Change The Results


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:Parents take a note:
When you force your child into a profession against his interest/wish..
Result will be a Rahul Gandhi

?...............

 There are more seats in Tata NANO than seats won by AAP. 

?...?.?..............

17 - 18 may ko poora din pogo pe chhota bheem telecast hoga ...
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a nice gesture of modi towards rahul gandhi
 rahul ka dard chhota bheem kam. karega😅