Jokes unlimited

Jokes unlimited


Bush: Osama mile toh use fod do..

Gandhi: Hinsa achi baat nhi, use chhod do..

Einstein: Samay rukta nhi, to use mod do..

Manmohan: theek hai!

Sonia: desh k liye mujhe vote do..

Arnold Schwarzenegger: Biceps build karne ke liye uspar load do..

Bill Gates: Windows unlock karne k liye use code do!

Rajnikanth: oye admin ! mere kaarname duniya ke samne lana chhod do

And the best one

.
.
ACP Praduman: Daya, khooni andar hai, main kehta hu darwaza tod do..

सासूबाई (नव्या सुनेला):- हे बघ, या घरात मी गृहमंत्री आहे. अर्थमंत्रालयही मीच सांभाळते.

तुझे सासरे परराष्ट्रमंत्री तर तुझा नवरा अन्न व वस्त्रपुरवठामंत्री आहे. तुझी नणंद नियोजन व देखरेख मंत्रालय सांभाळते.

तुला कोणतं खातं हवं?

सूनबाई:- मी आपली विरोधी पक्षातच बसते.


Now mothers will reprimand their kids in the following way.
Modi ban na hai na?
Phir Rahul wali harkat kyu ki?
Ab Manmohan ban ke kyu khada hai?
Bol ya toh Kejriwal ki tarah thappad khayega ?



Finally, the bizarre is over and here goes the awards for different category.
Best Actor: Arvind Kejriwal.
Best Debut child actor: Rahul Gandhi.
Best female actor in supporting role- Mamta Banerjee.
Best female actor in negative role- Sonia Gandhi.
Best actor in Romantic role- Digvijay Singh.
Life time achievement award-Lal Krishna Advani.
Movie of the year-Abki baar Modi Sarkar.
Its heard that Anurag Basu has approached Manmohan Singh for "Barfi 2" 

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Comedy Questionnaire with Alia

After Alia Bhatt's famous reply to a Question on
Koffee with Karan as to
who is the President of
India to which she replied PRITHVIRAJ CHAUHAN.
😤😝😤😝😤😝😤😝
Here are a few more replies from ALIA
Karan: Which food do u love the most?
Alia: Desi
Karan: which dish?
Alia: Pasta
😤😝😤😝😤😝😤
Varun Dhawan: Alia tum
meri koi bhi facebook
update like kyun nahin
karti
Alia: Nahi Varun, Main to tumhari saari posts do baar like karti hoon.
😝😤😝😤😝😤😝😤
Who is the coach of Indian women's hockey team?
Alia: Shah Rukh Khan,
Oh no sorry, Kabir Khan
😝😤😝😤😝😤😝😤
Alia Bhatt on KBC
Which of the following is the Largest
A. A peanut
B. An Elephant
C. The Moon
D. A Kettle
Alia: it's B.
An elephant
😤😝😤😝😤😝😤😝
Navjot Sidhu: Alia Have
you heard about Don
Bradman
Alia: Sorry i am not
interested in the Underworld
😤😤😤😤😤😤😤
Pooja Bhatt: Inni Saj Dhaj ke kyun Baithi ho
Alia: Koi anne waala hai
Pooja: Kaun???
Alia: Achhe Din
😤😝😤😝😤😝😤
Rahul Gandhi: I am reading Shakespeare to improve my GK
Alia: Achha!! Who wrote it????
😤😝😤😝😤😝😤😝
Bunty: Alia Modi Ji PM banne wale hain.
Alia: Sahi hai bunty, But AM kaun banega???
😝😤😝😤😝😤😝😤
Chetan Bhagat: Hey Alia, what is the opposite of IIT???
Alia: U U Coffee.
😝😝😝😝😝😝😝😝
When ALIA BHATT forgot her facebook password she tried searching it on GOOGLE.
😤😤😤😤😤😤😤😤
Alia to Police: Aap kahan jaa rahe ho.
Police: Lathi Charge Karne
Alia: Toh Charger toh lete jao.
😤😝😝😤😝😤😝😤😝
Alia calls Air India and asks how long will it take to travel from Mumbai to delhi.
Agent replies: "Just a Minute Ma'am"
Alia says Thank you and Hangs up.
😆😆😆😆😆😆😆😆😆
Do you see Formula 1??
Alia: No, I Hate Maths.
😜😜😜😜😜😜😜😜
Alia can you tell what is 3x4???
Alia: it's easy, answer is 12
And what is 4x3??
Alia: Very simple it's 21.
😝😝😝😝😝😝😝😝😝
Modi Ji ka first Name kya hai??
Alia: Abki Baar.
😆😝😆😝😆😝😆😝
Who was the first person to climb Mt. Everest?
Alia: Simple. The person who made it.
😆😤😆😤😆😤

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